The main points of the Budget

The main and most unavoidable aspect of the Budget speech in parliament today was the noise level of M.P.s howling and jeering. If the fate of our nation is going to be swayed by M.P.s of which party can howl and jeer loudest and longest, voters must take this into account when choosing an M.P.

Prospective members of parliament will need to demonstrate their essential howling and jeering abilities before we can even consider voting for them. Competitive demonstrations of howling and jeering by prospective members of parliament could be held in town centres over the next few weeks, to be judged on volume, duration and style.

I think you will find that such 'behavior' is based upon the old adage of 'he who shouts loudest gets heard/ listened to'. It does work - as you will find if you have ever been in a committee room and wish to get your point accepted. Therefore your criteria as above has sound merit. All you need to do now is go to the town centre, find a box to stand on, and demand a new acceptance procedure for aspiring MP's. Brilliant. Send me a photo.

Wearing down a committe or meeting with loud blathering until they lose all interest in life and just want you to stop is a recognised method, but not entirely at the heart of democracy.

Members of parliament have to survive and thrive, and sometimes to speak in a cacophony of hollering and jeering, indeed it is the currency of their occupation.

The town centre hollering test is an essential for candidates, it is really quite shocking that it has been overlooked so far.

Candidates who do well on the hollering but not so well on the subtleties of paperwork may wish to consider a second choice occupation as rag and bone men, an honorable and traditional trade.

Ahhh. I remember it well. Donkey stone. I'll have a yeller ochare one please. Yeller ochare!! I'z gwetten brown 'un's and white 'un's an' thall has what us given. Cheeky monkey. Bugger off.